I was watching a Mark Lowry video last night. There were a few thoughts I thought were worth pondering....
"Even if you don't see a miracle, you can choose to believe"
"My faith is a flickering light - I just have to remember what I saw in the light and keep walking."
There were some songs witn interesting lyrics...and here are some I could find...
Some things never change...
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-XSgfzwlag">
Home where I belong...
Friday, January 12, 2007
Thursday, January 4, 2007
Image in real life….
For the past few days, this thought has been at the back of my mind... and last night, well it was 3am this morning...when I lay down in bed, I could not sleep ...wrote it down before I went to sleep...
The comparison of what I am today with what kinda person I wanted to be when I was a kid.
When you were a kid, did you ever create an image of yourself - the person you'd like to be when you grow up? I am not talking about your professional life, we all do that when we are kids...I am talking about the personal life. Have you ever thought of the values you'd hold close to your heart, the principles you'd live by, and the kind of person you'd be at the end of the day? If you did think about these things, what do you see now? Are you living up to that childhood image of yourself? Are you better or worse?
I used to think about this when I was a kid and I had this strong image of the person I'd be - a person of strong heart, living by my values and principles, seeing the world in black and white, changing the world one day at a time, living the kinda life that inspires people, adopting children, and stuff like that.
Now, when I look back, I find that I have achieved some of these, gone wayward in some others, and yet to try some others. Honestly, I don't think I would be a perfect fit anymore. For better or worse, I don't think I can ever be the person I thought I would be.
What about you?
The comparison of what I am today with what kinda person I wanted to be when I was a kid.
When you were a kid, did you ever create an image of yourself - the person you'd like to be when you grow up? I am not talking about your professional life, we all do that when we are kids...I am talking about the personal life. Have you ever thought of the values you'd hold close to your heart, the principles you'd live by, and the kind of person you'd be at the end of the day? If you did think about these things, what do you see now? Are you living up to that childhood image of yourself? Are you better or worse?
I used to think about this when I was a kid and I had this strong image of the person I'd be - a person of strong heart, living by my values and principles, seeing the world in black and white, changing the world one day at a time, living the kinda life that inspires people, adopting children, and stuff like that.
Now, when I look back, I find that I have achieved some of these, gone wayward in some others, and yet to try some others. Honestly, I don't think I would be a perfect fit anymore. For better or worse, I don't think I can ever be the person I thought I would be.
What about you?
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
The year gone by….
It’s that time of the year when I tend to look back and wonder how different this year has been…one year is never the same as the other and this year too, I did things I’ve never done before, been to places I’ve never been before and met people I’ve never before…strangers turned to friends and friends to strangers….love to hate and hate to love…
Some of the prominent changes …
For the first time in my life, I am living away from home and enjoying it. Yes, it makes life a lot more interesting and teaches you to depend on yourself a lot. In a way, I think it makes you less dependant on others, especially if you choose to live on your own…the way I do, all on my own in a single BR….
I think I am getting used to the fact that friends can turn to strangers as time goes by…. It does hurt when it happens with someone you didn’t expect…or someone you were close to…but then, that is life… so, there are one or two – I wish they had the sense to talk it out instead of judging based on someone’s assumptions… if you don’t know what this means, I am not talking about you….
…to be continued….
Some of the prominent changes …
For the first time in my life, I am living away from home and enjoying it. Yes, it makes life a lot more interesting and teaches you to depend on yourself a lot. In a way, I think it makes you less dependant on others, especially if you choose to live on your own…the way I do, all on my own in a single BR….
I think I am getting used to the fact that friends can turn to strangers as time goes by…. It does hurt when it happens with someone you didn’t expect…or someone you were close to…but then, that is life… so, there are one or two – I wish they had the sense to talk it out instead of judging based on someone’s assumptions… if you don’t know what this means, I am not talking about you….
…to be continued….
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
The Eventful Year!
Last week when I went to worship, I found the church newsletter and picked up a copy. I found something both amusing and saddening on the first page of the newsletter.
Am producing it here with no edits:
Last year has been the most rewarding, eventful and successful period in the life and work of --- Church, .
The year has passed with creditable performance by successfully implementing most of the promises made before the election last year by the Pastorate Committee Members, who were elected to office on 31st July 2005. One year is not a long period but the Pastorate Committee has packed it with full of events realizing most of its electoral promises. The Electoral promises were converted as vision of the Pastorate Committee.
It is a success story of the Pastorate Committee, which is completing one year in office on 31st July 2006. The year in review has witnessed a number of developmental, progressive and new constructive programs for the glory of God. At the time of elections, the need of the hour was to restore peace in the Church. Accordingly, the Committee has successfully isolated litigants and un-social elements and truly restores much needed peace with the blessings and guidance of our Lord Jesus Christ, thus fulfilling the first promise made to the congregation before the elections.
Am producing it here with no edits:
Last year has been the most rewarding, eventful and successful period in the life and work of --- Church, .
The year has passed with creditable performance by successfully implementing most of the promises made before the election last year by the Pastorate Committee Members, who were elected to office on 31st July 2005. One year is not a long period but the Pastorate Committee has packed it with full of events realizing most of its electoral promises. The Electoral promises were converted as vision of the Pastorate Committee.
It is a success story of the Pastorate Committee, which is completing one year in office on 31st July 2006. The year in review has witnessed a number of developmental, progressive and new constructive programs for the glory of God. At the time of elections, the need of the hour was to restore peace in the Church. Accordingly, the Committee has successfully isolated litigants and un-social elements and truly restores much needed peace with the blessings and guidance of our Lord Jesus Christ, thus fulfilling the first promise made to the congregation before the elections.
Tuesday, November 7, 2006
Been a lot of pondering…
Another random thought:
If someone sat in the cab alone and said... the cab is full...all my other personalities are here too....
what would you do????
If someone sat in the cab alone and said... the cab is full...all my other personalities are here too....
what would you do????
Friday, November 3, 2006
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Time and rejection….
There was this soul on earth living within a cheerful lad. And even as everyone said he was so handsome and cheerful, his soul wasnt happy. No matter how much he tried, he could not lift his soul to a cheerful state. Even when he managed to be happy from within it lasted just for a little while before someone came along and bruised his soul.
Then one day, came a friend who tried to help him out. He refused to speak his heart out saying he didn't want to depend on anyone. But she was patient and had her way. He got to speak about his worries, his troubles, and every little thing. And so, the days went by....his soul was getting happier and he was happy too.
One day, as usual, his soul was pondering over something...something that made him feel agitated and so he called his friend. But she was too busy this time and told him he should not be expecting her to be able to talk 24 hours a day....and so, the soul came back bruised and battered....struggling to trust again...struggling with that something that was agitating...and so he was...back to square one.
On that fateful day, he made a decision that he would not depend on anyone else...and his soul too decided not too open up and share the thoughts within, with anyone else....
so, the days went by...gloomy and gray for him and his soul. It was indeed quite painful for him to get over his friend and her untimely rejection...well, is there a timely rejection???
Then one day, came a friend who tried to help him out. He refused to speak his heart out saying he didn't want to depend on anyone. But she was patient and had her way. He got to speak about his worries, his troubles, and every little thing. And so, the days went by....his soul was getting happier and he was happy too.
One day, as usual, his soul was pondering over something...something that made him feel agitated and so he called his friend. But she was too busy this time and told him he should not be expecting her to be able to talk 24 hours a day....and so, the soul came back bruised and battered....struggling to trust again...struggling with that something that was agitating...and so he was...back to square one.
On that fateful day, he made a decision that he would not depend on anyone else...and his soul too decided not too open up and share the thoughts within, with anyone else....
so, the days went by...gloomy and gray for him and his soul. It was indeed quite painful for him to get over his friend and her untimely rejection...well, is there a timely rejection???
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Is it possible to park a train?
After yesterday’s journey I think it is quite possible to park a train in the middle of nowhere. Well, when I went to sleep last night around 10 pm, we were running on time. In fact, the train was ahead of schedule in a few stations. And then, when I wake up, we reach a station around 5:30 – according to schedule we should have been there around 2am!! So, instead of the scheduled four and a half hours to cover that distance, we took about eight hours…..so, what could have happened??? I can’t think of any other reason…
End result, instead of reaching Secunderabad at 5:15am we reach at 9am!!!
End result, instead of reaching Secunderabad at 5:15am we reach at 9am!!!
Sunday, August 27, 2006
When I die
It is a bright sunny morning. I am in Chennai for a long weekend – been here since Thursday. As always, days are flying by – not just when I am in Chennai. Its has been this way ever since I moved to Hyderabad.
In the past week, I’ve heard about deaths and sicknesses – am not talking about the newspapers- and now I cant help but wonder what would it be like – when I die
I hope death doesn’t take away my near and dear ones – all too soon before I reach a certain stage in life. For al the detachment, there are things for which I want them to be around.
Am sure people would say the nice things. Death – in its own way – makes people think of the nice things. If only that could happen when the person is living!!
I still wonder what people would say when I die. There are a lot of things I can guess – given the fact that I have plenty of opportunities to get feedback. But then does it really matter? It doesn’t. Even in life, am not a person who would labor over each comment. So, why am I writing this? It was a thought and I guess I was in a writing mood.
[truth is, I need some silence. Something got messed up and I don’t want to be showing my anger and annoyance on those around me. A notebook and papers in hand makes everyone leave me alone. So here I am, in my own home, pretending as if am working on something official while all am doing is, pouring my thoughts]
In the past week, I’ve heard about deaths and sicknesses – am not talking about the newspapers- and now I cant help but wonder what would it be like – when I die
I hope death doesn’t take away my near and dear ones – all too soon before I reach a certain stage in life. For al the detachment, there are things for which I want them to be around.
Am sure people would say the nice things. Death – in its own way – makes people think of the nice things. If only that could happen when the person is living!!
I still wonder what people would say when I die. There are a lot of things I can guess – given the fact that I have plenty of opportunities to get feedback. But then does it really matter? It doesn’t. Even in life, am not a person who would labor over each comment. So, why am I writing this? It was a thought and I guess I was in a writing mood.
[truth is, I need some silence. Something got messed up and I don’t want to be showing my anger and annoyance on those around me. A notebook and papers in hand makes everyone leave me alone. So here I am, in my own home, pretending as if am working on something official while all am doing is, pouring my thoughts]
I apologize
I apologize for the times I’ve given advice – unasked for
I apologize for the times I’ve misunderstood you – not giving you a chance to explain
I apologize for taking up your time – you could have spent it doing something better
I apologize for the times I have contacted you – when I don’t know what to do.
I apologize – for anything and everything
One more depressing start to a supposedly beautiful day – all because I messed up a friendship.
11AM, Sunday, August 27, 2006
I apologize for the times I’ve misunderstood you – not giving you a chance to explain
I apologize for taking up your time – you could have spent it doing something better
I apologize for the times I have contacted you – when I don’t know what to do.
I apologize – for anything and everything
One more depressing start to a supposedly beautiful day – all because I messed up a friendship.
11AM, Sunday, August 27, 2006
Monday, August 14, 2006
My li’l bro…
...has grown up :O
well, more than often I have to remind myself that he is not a kid anymore...it happens quite a few times. Maybe, because he is the kid at home ...maynbe coz he behaves that way !!!
Still, I have been reminding myself quite a few times over the past few days....coz he is starting his work life today....am so very glad for him....
am sure he thought i am nuts when I was asking him about everything - right from his clothes to things to be taken on the first day...
call it protective, call it whatever.... That is what I am....and I guess he would always be my li'l bro
well, more than often I have to remind myself that he is not a kid anymore...it happens quite a few times. Maybe, because he is the kid at home ...maynbe coz he behaves that way !!!
Still, I have been reminding myself quite a few times over the past few days....coz he is starting his work life today....am so very glad for him....
am sure he thought i am nuts when I was asking him about everything - right from his clothes to things to be taken on the first day...
call it protective, call it whatever.... That is what I am....and I guess he would always be my li'l bro
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Google and Tsunami
I found this post in one of my earlier blogs
Google has become synonymous with web search. Often, we read about the change in the page ranking mechanism, the change in the number of pages crawled by the search engine and so on. In my current job, we heavily rely on Google to check for names, places, terminologies, and just about any entity which is not clear in the fax. Over the years, I find that I have my own set of tips for better search results and on deriving a conclusion over the various searches. For example, if there is a doubt over a word usage and Merriam Websters does not have that word simply because it is a new word, or because it is another business expression I would check the word in Google and the higher the hits, the more the usage. For example, the word “Screenshot”. This word wasn’t found in Websters, but we use that often. So what do I do? I check in Google for single word and 2 words. I would go for whichever returns the greater number of hits.
But, in spite of this, I wasn’t aware of the patterns that could be found in such searches. The most recent example was my search for the word “tsunami”. Just 2 days after the disaster, I was trying to collect information about it, and the search returned approx 4 million hits. Two or three few days later, as I was browsing, I impulsively tried the search again, and guess what I found? This time it was around 7 million hits. Till now, I have no clue as to where I got this idea of checking for the number of hits. About a week after the disaster, it was at 17,500,000. I was amazed at this kind of increase in the number of hits. I had expected to go up, but never expected it to be so much. Ten days after the disaster it came to 20,500,000. Today, January 11, 2005 – just over 2 weeks – it is at 27 million hits.
How far would it go? Will have to wait and see.
Well the upward trend continues and just 2 days later, January 13, it is at 30 million pages. I am now quite positive of seeing a tenfold increase before the month is over.
Today – January 21, 2005 – it is at 37,700,000
....that was the post... I chked it today and guess what ...it is at 105,000,000 (June 27, 2006)
Google has become synonymous with web search. Often, we read about the change in the page ranking mechanism, the change in the number of pages crawled by the search engine and so on. In my current job, we heavily rely on Google to check for names, places, terminologies, and just about any entity which is not clear in the fax. Over the years, I find that I have my own set of tips for better search results and on deriving a conclusion over the various searches. For example, if there is a doubt over a word usage and Merriam Websters does not have that word simply because it is a new word, or because it is another business expression I would check the word in Google and the higher the hits, the more the usage. For example, the word “Screenshot”. This word wasn’t found in Websters, but we use that often. So what do I do? I check in Google for single word and 2 words. I would go for whichever returns the greater number of hits.
But, in spite of this, I wasn’t aware of the patterns that could be found in such searches. The most recent example was my search for the word “tsunami”. Just 2 days after the disaster, I was trying to collect information about it, and the search returned approx 4 million hits. Two or three few days later, as I was browsing, I impulsively tried the search again, and guess what I found? This time it was around 7 million hits. Till now, I have no clue as to where I got this idea of checking for the number of hits. About a week after the disaster, it was at 17,500,000. I was amazed at this kind of increase in the number of hits. I had expected to go up, but never expected it to be so much. Ten days after the disaster it came to 20,500,000. Today, January 11, 2005 – just over 2 weeks – it is at 27 million hits.
How far would it go? Will have to wait and see.
Well the upward trend continues and just 2 days later, January 13, it is at 30 million pages. I am now quite positive of seeing a tenfold increase before the month is over.
Today – January 21, 2005 – it is at 37,700,000
....that was the post... I chked it today and guess what ...it is at 105,000,000 (June 27, 2006)
Reminds me of myself
Lyrics from "I am" of Hillary Duff... Can't help but think it's about me. So much like me....there are some who think am an angel and there are others who think I am such a pain in life... I know I can be both....
A big thank you for those who think I am wonderful and a bigger sorry for those who find me a pain....
I'm an angel, I'm a devil
I am sometimes in between
I'm as bad it can get
And good as it can be
Sometimes I'm a million colors
Sometimes I'm black and white
I am all extremes
Try figure me out you never can
There's so many things I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
I'm powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
I'm someone filled with self-belief
I'm haunted by self-doubt
I've got all the answers
I've got nothing figured out
I like to be by myself
I hate to be alone
I'm up and I am down
But that's part of the thrill
Part of the plan
Part of all of the things I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
I'm powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
I'm a million contradictions
Sometimes I make no sense
Sometimes I'm perfect
Sometimes I'm a mess
Sometimes I'm not sure who I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
And powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
--
A big thank you for those who think I am wonderful and a bigger sorry for those who find me a pain....
I'm an angel, I'm a devil
I am sometimes in between
I'm as bad it can get
And good as it can be
Sometimes I'm a million colors
Sometimes I'm black and white
I am all extremes
Try figure me out you never can
There's so many things I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
I'm powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
I'm someone filled with self-belief
I'm haunted by self-doubt
I've got all the answers
I've got nothing figured out
I like to be by myself
I hate to be alone
I'm up and I am down
But that's part of the thrill
Part of the plan
Part of all of the things I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
I'm powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
I'm a million contradictions
Sometimes I make no sense
Sometimes I'm perfect
Sometimes I'm a mess
Sometimes I'm not sure who I am
I am special
I am beautiful
I am wonderful
And powerful
Unstoppable
Sometimes I'm miserable
Sometimes I'm pitiful
But that's so typical of all the things I am
--
Monday, June 26, 2006
Have you ever wondered…
If there was someone like you, would you talk to that person?
Am not talking about the way you look...am talking about the real person...the person without the mask you wear for the world.
If you met someone like that, Would you talk?
Think about it....
Am not talking about the way you look...am talking about the real person...the person without the mask you wear for the world.
If you met someone like that, Would you talk?
Think about it....
Thursday, June 1, 2006
Letting go….
One of the hardest things to do on earth - Letting go. For some it is easier than the rest, nevertheless, I don't think it is really easy for anyone - to shrug off and let go. There have been times I've had to let go. Am sure all of us would have gone through this - but do you struggle as much as I do or not, I'd never know. As for myself, I struggle each time I go through this. The last time I struggled as much as I am now, was a few years ago. Quite unfortunately, there are too many similarities and I can only hope I would pull through the way I did last time. There is something that comforts me a lot this time - the person I let go last time is a good pal now.
Will it happen again? I will have to wait for that...through it all....
Will it happen again? I will have to wait for that...through it all....
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